Simple Tools I Use With Children and Families

This practice highlight is about some of the simple tools I use in direct work with children and families. They are not complicated or perfect, but they have helped to open up conversations about safety, feelings and change in a gentle, structured way.

All examples are anonymised and details have been changed to protect confidentiality.

Why I like using simple tools

Children and adults do not always find it easy to talk directly about what is happening or how they feel. Worries about being judged, loyalty to family members, language barriers and past experiences with services can all get in the way.

Simple tools can help by:

• Giving something to focus on other than eye contact
• Turning big, vague questions into smaller, clearer steps
• Making abstract ideas like safety, trust and hope more concrete
• Helping to record and remember what was said in a way that can be shared

Most of the tools I use can be done with paper and pens, sticky notes, simple printed worksheets or basic objects you can find in most settings.

Example 1: Safety and support network mapping

One tool I often use is a basic safety and support network map. This can be adapted for children, parents or carers.

It usually involves:

• Drawing the child or family in the middle of the page
• Asking who they feel safe with or able to talk to, and placing those people closer or further away
• Adding professionals, schools, clubs or community spaces where they feel supported
• Talking about who knows what is happening and who does not, and whether that feels okay

This can lead to useful conversations about isolation, hidden support and who might be involved more in future safety planning.

Example 2: Scaling questions

Scaling questions are a simple way to explore change over time and what might help.

I might ask:

• On a scale of 0 to 10, where 10 means “things feel really safe at home” and 0 means “things feel very unsafe”, where would you put things at the moment?
• What tells you it is at that number and not lower?
• What would be different if it moved up by one point?
• Who would notice first if things changed, and what would they see?

These questions can be written or drawn, and they work well with older children, teenagers and adults.

Example 3: Feelings and body map

For younger children, or for anyone who finds it hard to talk about feelings in words, a simple body outline can help.

I might:

• Draw or use a printed outline of a person
• Ask the child where in their body they feel certain emotions, such as worry, anger or happiness
• Use colours or symbols to show different feelings
• Talk about what helps the feelings get bigger or smaller

This can help link physical sensations to emotions and give clues about what helps the child feel calmer or safer.

Example 4: Hopes and worries postcards

Another simple tool is a “hopes and worries” exercise, sometimes using small cards or pieces of paper.

It usually includes:

• Asking the child or parent to write or draw their main worries on separate pieces of paper
• Doing the same for their hopes, even if they feel far away
• Grouping the worries into themes, such as school, home, money or health
• Talking about which worries we can work on together now, which might take longer, and which are outside our control
• Linking hopes to small, realistic next steps

This can help people feel more heard and give structure to planning.

Keeping tools flexible and respectful

Tools are only useful if they fit the person and situation. I try to:

• Check whether the child or adult is comfortable with drawing, writing or using worksheets at all
• Avoid pushing tools if someone is tired, distressed or not in the right state for them
• Offer choices, for example “would you like to talk, draw, or use cards today?”
• Be mindful of culture, language and accessibility needs
• Remember that tools should support the conversation, not take it over

Sometimes the best tool is simply careful listening and time.

Recording and sharing outcomes

After using any tool, it is important to:

• Record what was done and what the child or adult said, in their own words where possible
• Reflect on what the exercise showed about strengths, worries and next steps
• Share key points with families in a clear and respectful way
• Bring the learning into supervision and planning

In future, I hope to turn some of these ideas into simple downloadable sheets that students and new workers can adapt for their own practice.

Final thoughts

The tools I use with children and families are not complicated or special. They are small, practical ways to help people tell their stories and think about safety and change in a more structured way.

You do not need a suitcase full of resources to do good direct work. Often, a few simple tools, used thoughtfully and respectfully, can support deep and meaningful conversations that might not happen otherwise.